BBClub
by Cobalt Blue1
Summary: Dumbledore recieves an odd request for a school club. Bizarre voyeurism!! (and bad humor) *g*


BB-Club  
  
Author: CobaltBlue  
  
Author note: Silliness warning!!  
  
Albus Dumbledore was sitting in front of his office´s desk, covered with brown, greyish and white feathers, stunned.  
  
Just a moment ago, he had opened one of his windows, and a tidal wave of something brown, greyish and white had nearly knocked him out without any warning. Judging from the state of the office room, a division of insane hippogriffs had made an brutal invasion to the place. However, judging from the pile of letters, scrolls and small boxes on the floor, his daily post had been just delievered.  
  
Headmaster soonly recovered from his shock. After all, this was just a daily procedure, it had only taken him by surprise because it was ten minutes early. Normally he had time well enough to barricade himself behind the bookshelves.  
  
Dumbledore sipped his coffee, coughed a huge amount of small feathers away, and started to open some of the envelopes. Most of them were from Ministry Of Magic, containing "Help us, we´ve fucked things up badly" said in dozens of ways.  
  
There was also a hologram letter from Cornelius Fudge. "Oh, my my, the Moron Of Magic himself is approaching me, I´m flattered..." he muttered under his beard.  
  
Dumbledore tapped the letter with his wand to release the hologram message. A dim figure of C. Fudge appeared in front of him.  
  
"Dear Albus," the hologram started, "I have just fucked Arthur Wea... errr... I mean things up, very badly, care to pay me a visit??"  
  
The figure disappeared with a loud pop. Dumbledore was shocked. "He actually wasted a good hologramming charm to say THAT??"  
  
Shaking his head, he continued with his post. There was a request from Rita Skeeter for a private interview. For her, he replied quickly his usual "No way, you frigid cow!". "A private interview, my ass!" he laughed.  
  
Next one was a small scroll.  
  
"I challenge you to a duel! Place: Dark Forest, Time: 5.00 o´clock tomorrow  
  
~L. Malfoy  
  
"How patethic.", he sighed, dipped his quill in the ink, and wrote an answere.  
  
"Dear L. Malfoy  
  
Quite a machochist, are you? I beat you three times in a duel last week, and you are still asking for more? Poor boy.  
  
~Sincerely, A.Dumbledore  
  
"Now that´ll set him up really", he snickered as he sent the small parchment.  
  
The last one was a letter, wich was addressed only "Headmaster". With mild curiosity, Dumbledore opened the envelope.  
  
Dear Headmaster  
  
With great respect, we are asking your permission for our BB-Club. You are most welcome to our opening gathering in the class of History Of Magic, at 8.00 tonight.  
  
~Gryffindor male grade ´98 ~Slytherin male grade ´98  
  
"What on earth could be BB-club?? Bodybuilding?? Barebucking?? How I´m supposed to know anything about some silly acronyme? We´ll see then..."  
  
Dumbledore floated along the long corridors, now lit by torches. He was dressed in his very best robes of purple velvet, and he had token his guilded ceremonial wand with him.  
  
Soonly, he arrived to the door of Class Of History Of Magic. Small sign on the door said:  
  
BB-Club opening night Please notice, private, Headmaster welcome  
  
Dumbledore started to get curious. He leaned forward to hear what was spoken behind the door. He felt somehow silly to eavesdrop in his own school, but he wanted to know what was going on in the class, and his spying equipment he had normally in his use, was in his office. The voices echoing behind the door, however, got him startled.  
  
"Push it deeper, Dean, deeper!!!" yearned the voice of Ron Weasley. "Ahh...! Perfect, mmm... yes, Crabbe, yes Goyle, more, ahh..." moaned a voice, wich Dumbledore recognised as Harry Potter´s.  
  
What the hell is going on there?? Wasn´t this supposed to be a somewhat normal school club?? He leaned closer again.  
  
"You suck!!" said Blaise Zabini. "Oh, I guess so..." sighed Neville Longbottom´s voice. "Again.."  
  
"Crabbe, you split some on the table! Wait! Let me lick it from there...*slurp*" said Harry, again. "No, Draco, no!" shouted Seamus´ voice, "don´t stuck it all there at once! Slowly, please..." "Like this? Yes... this way.." answered Draco´s voice.  
  
Now this was definetly enough. It was compleately fine to have sex, but to invite Headmaster within?? What did they think?? Considering me as some kind of old perv, were they??  
  
Dumbledore slammed the door open, and stormed in.  
  
The sight was nothig he had expected. Tough it only proved achingly, that he actually was an old perv, or his mind was, at least.  
  
A huge banderol in front of the class was saying: Boy´s Baking Club, 1st issue  
  
Dean Thomas and Ronald Weasley were putting a cake to the oven.  
  
Harry, Crabbe and Goyle were whipping cream for the cake, Neville had stepped on the egg parcel, and Blaise was critisizing him for it.  
  
Seamus and Draco were adding some flour to the bun batter.  
  
"Oh, hello and welcome Headmaster Dumbledore!" said Harry, as he noticed him. "We have started yet, we just wanted to show you the club we estabilished for fun. Be our guest..."  
  
Harry´s welcoming babble went on and on and on...  
  
~fin~ 


End file.
